I was 11 years old when the incident happened. It is not easy for a girl to tell the world the pain she once felt in the dark, my lips tremble and knees go weak every time I recall it. I had recently started getting my periods.
My periods were irregular and my parents were constantly discussing about visiting the doctor.
It was a Saturday evening and I had gone out with the maid to buy some copies. When we came out of the shop, a middle-aged man called me and told the maid to stand at a bit distance. He took a hanky in his hand, opened it and whispered into my ears “Your father just called me and said you are not having your periods. I am a doctor and I will take you to my clinic” and I don’t know whether I was hypnotised, but I started following him. The irregularity of periods is very common for all girls at this age, that’s how maybe he guessed it.
But I am still not sure how he came to know about it, maybe he was bluffing.
I could not protest or say a single word but kept going with him. I could not hear my maid crying behind me, I could not hear the horn of the cars. I was petrified. He took me to a narrow lane, and suddenly held me tight. He told me to undress my top. I was gaining my strength back slowly but was too weak to protest. I pushed him away and he held me even more tightly as he pulled up my shirt. He pressed me against the wall bitterly, and touched my private parts. It hurt. Then he asked me to remove my skirt. I protested and asked him to leave me. I begged. He didn’t listen.
He snatched open my skirt and grabbed me. He entered inside my body and kept pushing hard till I started bleeding. I begged but he went on.
And then, suddenly he left me and said: “Go back and don’t tell this to anyone”. I got back my strength and started running. I was still weak and didn’t want to look back at the man again. I kept running till I found the main road and tried to find my uncle. I didn’t realize I was away for more than an hour. My maid had meanwhile told my parents that I was missing and now they were on the road, tensed, searching for me. I gathered courage and told them that nothing had happened. I was too young then to understand what a “sexual crime” is. I was too small to realize that shouting may have helped and that I could have filed an FIR. All I knew was, what has happened was absolutely wrong and my parents would get hurt if they knew of it. So I somehow remained strong. I kept quiet for years and finally told my parents six years later when I couldn’t bear it any more.
I would like to specially mention that this incident does not haunt me anymore.
It took me years to realize that keeping quiet is not the solution and it only encourages this kind of crime. It was initially tough to tell the world with such details, but now it’s not because I’m now aware of the fact that being molested or raped is nothing to be ashamed of. Thousands of people go through these things and keep quiet because our society directly and indirectly teaches so. It’s high time we need to open our mouth and protest. I wrote about this incident in hope that this will give people enough courage to speak against wrong.
Source – AkkarBakkar